My 12yo is spending all his money on V-Bucks. Should I be concerned?

Is your son always requesting online gaming gift cards? Is he spending all his money on V-Bucks? If you’re feeling uncomfortable about your kid spending so much money on virtual games, we have some talking points for you. 

Chapters

• 0:02 Parenting and Money Management for Gamers
• 7:19 Teaching Financial Literacy to Kids

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

Welcome to the Next Talk podcast. We are passionate about keeping kids safe in an overexposed world. We have some more parent questions today. You guys are sending more in, so I think you're liking this feedback. The feedback we've gotten so far is positive. Please keep letting us know if this podcast is helpful to you. With all the changes, we just want to make sure that we're still serving families well here at Next Talk by doing this podcast.

Speaker 1: 0:29

Before we get into the parent questions, I have a little devotional for you. Colossians 3, 12 has been on my heart and mind lately and I just I wanted to share it. It says since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Make allowance for each other's faults and forgive anyone who offends you. And forgive anyone who offends you. Remember the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. I was reading this the other day and you know how it says make allowance for each other's faults and forgive anyone who offends you. Okay, parents of teenagers, that's a word for you, because I'm a parent of a teenager and they're struggling. They got a lot coming at them. They're at school, you know, 8, 10, 12 hours. If you've got an athlete, I've got an athlete, so he's at school a lot, and they may get home and not be maybe in the best mood, and I have to remind myself like this verse respond with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. I have to remind myself to respond that way and I just wanted to encourage that. I know sometimes we read that and we think of our enemies or somebody who's spewing hate on us about social media responding that way. And obviously we need to respond that way to people who don't like us. You know the Lord was telling me the other day you need to respond that way with the people you love the most. The people right across from your dinner table, like those people in your family, need you to make allowance for each other's fault, and so I hope that blesses you today. It was just on my heart and I wanted to share it. So I have had this question a couple times in different versions, and I want to say the latest version because this is the one that came through most recently. Here's what it was my 12 year old son is spending so much money on Fortnite. He wants gift cards for birthdays and holidays. I'm freaking out because I feel like it's such a waste of money for online stuff. Why am I so uneasy? Is this okay? Is it normal? This is a great question. I want to say to you. I assume your 12-year-old is your first child and it's the first time you're walking through this. This is normal.

Speaker 1: 3:21

I have a son and he used to be a gamer. I mean, he still is, but he used to really be a gamer and he loved Fortnite. He loved it, and so he was the same as your son. He would want gift cards for birthdays, christmas. All of that was asked for V-Bucks. Most of the time, he would spend his money on what's called skins and you can buy weapons to emotes or a thing where you can buy it. Those are like dances that you can buy, and so they're buying things to kind of accessorize their character.

Speaker 1: 3:58

Now, I remember when this first started happening with him. I was uneasy about it too, because I'm like online, what in the world? Like I have to understand this. I would ask him what do you want to buy with it? And he would sit down and show me the dances he would want to buy the skins he would want to buy and that sort of thing. As he showed me those things, you know what I envisioned in my mind Build-A-Bear. I don't know where, that's where my mind went, but you remember when we used to take our kids to build I mean, some people still do you take your kids to Build-A-Bear and they get different outfits for the bear. That's what it is. You're buying a skin, a different outfit for your online character, and so I know it feels weird, but that's kind of like their virtual world how they're doing it. So I don't think there's necessarily anything wrong with it. Now there could be inappropriate skins you don't want them having, or inappropriate dances or something like that. That's a different conversation, but generally, I think that we need to look at it that way.

Speaker 1: 4:53

You also need to be thinking about you don't want your kid to waste money, because I remember we had a ton of those outfits laying around that they never changed the bear's clothes, and so at that time I would start talking to my kid about saving money, not being wasteful. I would start explaining the value of what things cost, and I think you should be doing that too, at 12 years old. So when you go out to dinner, they need to know this is how much dinner costs tonight. Equate the money that you're spending on things to what they're spending money on online. So this would cost how much for that skin. They need to understand the value of the money. If your bank account allows you to open up a child bank account, do that Invest.

Speaker 1: 5:38

This is when my son, when he first started using V-Bucks all the time and I wanted him to understand the value of a dollar and I'm okay with you buying a skin, but I don't want you wasting money Like are you going to use this skin, is it going to be useful or are you just collecting all of these and they're just sitting there and it's a waste of money. So I started talking to him about investing. We bought his first stock for him because I wanted him to see how it could grow over time and that way he's understanding that. Also, like with chores in our house and I know this is like you think this was a question about V-Bucks but this matters because you're wanting them to think about how they're spending their money. You want them to be responsible and instead of just saying no and shutting it down. We want to counter that with some education on what else you could be spending your money on.

Speaker 1: 6:27

With his chores at home, he has to do certain things that he doesn't get money for, like general stuff Put away your laundry, you know. Keep your, you know, keep the main area cleaned up with your clothes and stuff like that. Like like you got to be responsible for certain things unloading the dishwasher. That's just part of you being a part of this family and contributing to the families, to the family unit. He could also do other things that were extra to make money. And so say, he mowed the yard or he dusted my baseboards or stuff like that, that he actually earned money. Then have the conversation with him Wow, you earned $30, but how long did it take you? Four hours. Well, are you going to spend all of that on one skin? With one click of a button and it's gone. So that way they're just understanding the value of the dollar.

Speaker 1: 7:19

I think that's the bigger conversation that can also help them see why they want to spend their money on V-Bucks, but I wouldn't ban it. I mean, I feel like it's just part of their culture growing up. They're buying the skins online versus us going into a store and buying something. We just have to have that context of the value of a dollar and let's not waste the money. Another thing that I just want to say is, if you are like, ooh, I would like to start investing, or whatever, and you're new to that space to resources, that I love, that I watch regularly, is the Dave Ramsey show and then also the money guys both really good information.

Speaker 1: 8:01

Of course, my son at 12 would not sit through one of those podcasts, but sometimes they share screenshots or whatever, and I would. I would shoot, you know, take a picture of a screenshot of something on the podcast and then maybe that's a conversation at dinner. You know, if you invest this much money every month, starting at 25, this is how much you're gonna retire with. Just again, getting them to think outside of their little virtual world of VBOTS. I think that's really important. I hope this is helpful. Make a donation today at nexttalkorg. This podcast is not intended to replace the advice of a trained healthcare or legal professional, or to diagnose, treat or otherwise render expert advice regarding any type of medical, psychological or legal problem. Listeners are advised to consult a qualified expert for treatment.